I watched mom, in her Binga mobile, leave this morning. She had a meeting downtown Petoskey. Snow and rain left a slippery conglomeration of stuff on the ground and I was concerned for her, having to park even a few blocks away.
The girls and I were doing school and so I prayed outloud, "Lord, please give mom a close parking spot, so she won't have to walk far..please Lord.."
After she got home, she told me there were 6 spots, on BOTH sides of the street, right in front of the door she needed to get into. No, it was not early morning. About 11:00am actually.
Here we are waiting for her biopsy results and I am praying for a close parking spot..the contrast is lopsided only when compared to the "big stuff" like benign or malignant.
One thing I have learned through my cancer journey is not to compare prayers and the answers to those prayers. When I do, I am focusing more on the answer than the One Who holds it and knows. I can remember many, many times being jealous, I mean, green with envy, towards somone who had an answer to their prayer, while I still waited. This is me before cancer-- "God, can't You see me? Don't you care?? Why do they get their answer and I do not?? Have I done something wrong? Can't you see what I do for You??"
God wants me to seek after Him and prayer is the vehicle for that seeking. It is a way of life, not simply some act I perform and then wait, while tapping my foot , for God to perform.
I am on my way to town and the phone rings.. I hear Mom crying...my heart is instantly in my throat..
"I just got a call from the Dr's office...."
"The nurse said it's benign and is called a fibroid cluster of something.."
I pulled over and grabbed my daughter's hands and we thanked God for His answer. Oh God thank You...
Tonight as mom stood in the kitchen, tears made her eyes shiney..she was listening to our praise music while we prepared a celebratory stir fry..
I gave her a big hug..
Father thank You for helping us through a difficult, anxiety prone few days. Thank You for Your presence with Mom and our family.. Thank You for the prayers uttered by Your people. Thank You for your answer..Thank You for how You are my rock and my salvation when my heart is waiting..
Thank You for the words I read this morning from Psalm 62 before I knew her test results..
"My soul waits in silence for God alone, from Him is my salvation.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
my stronghold, I shall not be greatly shaken."
Bless each of you this Thanksgiving,
He is faithful,