HOPE

My Bible defines hope as: the expectation of future good; comfort, expectation, confidence, or trust.. Hmmm.
Obviously there are different kinds of hope, and hope is described differently, like from I Peter 1:3 which says," Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His great mercy has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead.."

My hope is from Him, Psalm 62:5 boasts.
Faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1

The pic above is from our HOPE garden. We, Mom and I, wanted to create a peaceful, prayerful, beautiful place to be in, after Steve's arrival in Heaven. We chose the name HOPE because it fits well--it is a place of comfort, because we seek God's help as we grieve.
It is a place of expectation, because we believe we will see Steve again in Heaven.
It is a place of confidence and trust because we put our confidence and trust in God and in Him alone.

Does this mean every time I go into it, I feel good? No. It means it is a visual reminder of who and what I am placing my hope in, and that I believe God's promises. He is my hope.

One night, last week, I was sitting here at the computer, trying to come up with a blog post...I could not...I felt frustrated. I wanted to write something meaningful, something powerful, something that would speak to the hearts of those who read..

The anniversary of my brother's death was looming..I really felt at a loss. "Who cares anyway?", I thought. I was judging care by number of comments, alas, a common trap we bloggers fall into--the more comments, the more people "care" about what you just said.

Then I noticed it. The sun was setting and a single shaft of sunlight was piercing through the trees, across the HOPE garden, highlighting the HOPE doodad and landing on my keyboard..It was absolutely beautiful!! Some days I jokingly ask God for a billboard, especially if I am in the midst of trouble and need a fix/solution. Here it was, spelled out for me, on the night before my brother entered Heaven, one year ago,..a billboard of sorts, in my own back yard..

H-O-P-E.

In my frustration, He met me. He spoke tenderly to His daughter. In my grief, He gave me hope. I know I will see my brother again, but I feel like I am living tediously in a balance of knowing he is in Heaven vs. missing him here on earth.

I am. But I am not alone. Someone BIGGER and GREATER than my grief is right here, shining light into my dark places..

He is my very, present help.

I love you Lord,

Bonnie