Sunday, February 5, 2012

One of those days

This day has bested me.  Vertigo struck last night.  It never tells me when it's coming and I certainly do not welcome it's arrival.  I took said vertigo drugs which I believe turn me into a bonnie version of a zombie...
grumpy, ugly and ungrateful.
Girls left for church with me home, spinning slightly.  Tim has a rotten cold.  He was what I call "no fun."
My zombie compassion was zilch.

I turned to food today to fill the ache in my heart.  It didn't work very well. I did read my Bible, but zombies do not understand Bible verses..  Especially when they are reading with a holes in their heart, wanting to be filled with strudel, chocolate or popcorn.

The words of Paul did echo in my soul today..He did ask--no he "entreated"  God to take away a thorn in his flesh, 3 times.  God said  NO.

"My grace is sufficient for you,  for My power is perfected in weakness." II Corinthians 12:9

To be gut wrenchingly honest, today did not FEEL like His grace was sufficient.  I know zombies cannot feel, but this daylight hour, I did.  I whined.  I complained.  I grumped.  I hurled smallish logs at bigger ones, hoping to free them from their frozen places.  I hurt my wrist in the process..

It is only now, in the quiet of the evening, after eating more popcorn, and watching a football game that made me think much of my brother-- the words

My grace is sufficient gently wafted to my heart.

One of the attributes of God is not pushiness.  He does not heft Himself upon me.  He waits, like a father--who has just talked with a son--- for the son to come and make things right.


What does that mean?  For me, as a believer in Jesus Christ, it means that when the day I'm living is a zombie-fied disaster, the kindness of God, towards me, His daughter, is sufficient.

God please forgive me for my attitude today.  You say if I confess my sins, You are faithful and just to forgive my sins and cleanse me from ALL unrighteousness.  I John 1:9
Forgive me for the anger, that I let rule me..You say that the anger of man does not achieve the righteous life that You desire for me..James 1:20

Thank You that You are sufficient God.
Not popcorn.
Not chocolate.
Not turning to any substance, thing, show or computer junk--(fbook)
but You.

I am laying my head on my pillow, next to my snorky husband, and believing You and Your Word tonight.

You are faithful,

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